POETRY III


I dug a hole very deep under the elm tree
might seem a grave I dug for thee
I dug deeper still these feelings to kill
Anger, loss, grief and stupidity still
For now I drop them in, all the lies
pledges, promises broken, hurt
every handwritten note in earth I laid
All the lies I heard and I once forgave
I pushed them down the hole deep
As I continued to weep
I pressed them hard in the dirt beneath
Pressing lips and grinding my teeth
I placed one mossy rock upon another
just what was close and no bother
then twined a ribbon of daisies wreath
Like our love they died but with no grief

DREAMS
The sound loud as thunder
a breathtaking majestic wonder
roaring power yet so serene
cascading over rock it careens
glowing white reflecting starlight
what a beauty to behold in my sight
Gleaming, crystal water so pure and true
dropping from jagged rock in crystal hue
reflecting on stones of white  as snow
Falling to the sand and pebbles below
Majestic waterfall of my dreams
Quilt of Life
Pieces of fabric make up  life
Many are tattered and worn
Not many beautiful and new
Most of a different color or hue
Pieces patterned on  Josephs coat

Black and reds they did abound
As when young I went to town
Wearing colors of the night
I knew I looked fine, just right

Some with pretty girl pinks and bows
Those I wore with joy and love
For the baby girls sent from above
Some I wore with silver and  gold
When feeling quite oh… very bold

As these fabrics cut in measured squares
Brought memories back to taunt me
Fabrics rent with scars and tears
Some memories best left be
Many colors covered  in my fears
Black fabric worn with age and loss
Some with all that life offered, some to toss
Others with life’s blood so lost and stained
These measured squares of life’s time

QUILT OF LIFE
Sewn together by strings of life and it’s strife
Pieces that have seen such heartache and woe
Pieced together with no purpose or rhyme
Purpose and plan I will not know, not even in time
For God has chosen this path, this stitch, this pattern
Not for me to question His purpose or mind
He alone has stitched these measured squares
In the pattern He has so divined
With His forgiveness, mercy  and Grace
Sewn together with His words like lovely lace
For this quilted robe of life I shall wear
When for eternity I take my place.

copyright 2011~2013 Len Williams~Carver


WINTER
Dark, cold, heavy snow everywhere

Silence so quiet it is deafening, 
One hears pine needles fall
Stars in dark sky light a path
As Sheep huddle close 
Cattle herd for warmth   
As temperatures plunge
To depths unknown
Morning dawns

Heavy snow bending boughs
Sun rays peeking through
Crystals like brilliant spears
as sparkling diamond tears

~~~
Lying here next to you
Trying to quietly sob
Afraid of you hearing
And asking “Why?”
Lying here next to you
Crying for us
And how we used to be
When fun was in our life
Laughing and teasing
feeling  love and passion
Lying here next to you
In this queen-sized bed
Remembering how we
wrapped around each other
Speaking of everyday life
Love and fears
Now we lie as strangers
In this queen-sized bed
Space between us
Vast as the oceans wide.
~~~

Petals of rose so velvet
Touching my skin
Surely this good is sin
Playing with my senses
~~~
Dancing like drop of water in hot skillet
Moving faster than a June bug in Zapper
~~~
Jive Talker Jive Walker
Stylin as your Lyin
Playing the Player
With lies and alibis
~~

Sun and Moon wane
Rain and wind came
Leaving left me lame
Love out like a flame
~~~
Hi~top sneakers
All he asks
Sixty dollars
Makes my heart weaker
Breaks to say ~sorry
His dream of tryouts~ shattered
B~Ball is his game ..scouted
Pawn shop items scattered
To fulfill his dream.

CHRISTMAS EVE
In the darkness of night

Under the stars and moon 
Holiday decor makes us swoon
At the  many windows we see
Flashing lights upon the trees
Fireplaces burning warm and bright
So cozy and warm Christmas Eve night
Mistletoe strategically placed all around
For tomorrow kisses will abound
Family and friends enter the door
Soon paper and ribbons on the floor
Aromas drift through the house
Enticing flavors make mouth water
Soon family and all depart
Leaving presents and feelings of love
That comes from Jesus’ birth 
Our blessing from above. 
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!
CHRISTMAS

Hanging the wreath on the door
Pine needles on the floor
The lights are on the tree
Mary, Joseph and Jesus
Set in  grass, for everyone to see
Christmas time is near.

Children write their lists
For all the latest gadgets and gifts
Mom or Dad in a  scurry
Buying a present all furry
Christmas time is near.

Shopping visits many to the mall
Children visit Santa sitting so tall
All around whispers  told
To that dear jolly man of old
Christmas time  is near.

Snow and cold abound
Red noses all around
Snowmen and snow ball fights
People running for home flights
Christmas time is near.

Family gathered round the tree
Gifts presented one for you two for me
Happy Birthday Jesus is sung
For He alone on a cross was hung
Let us not forget He is
The Reason For The Season.

THE GARDENER
He watched as the gardener raked the fall leaves into the pile

the brown and golden hued leaves crunched with each swipe

the pile kept  growing with each pull of the long-handled rake

When the gardener  walked away he ran from the porch and into the pile

He covered himself making sure nothing of himself showed

Lying very still his nose began to twitch and he pinched to stop it.

He did not hear the gardener return but suddenly he smelt and felt

the heat…

As he tried to move he found that something was holding him down
he tried to rise but he couldn’t breathe he felt paralyzed.

Suddenly in his mind he cried “Please Jesus Help Me” and with that

the heaviness lifted, his lungs cleared and Jesus lifted him up ..up..up
into the clouds
As he looked down seeing the gardener throwing more debris and brush on the fire
while all around the angels began to sing and Jesus carried him through the gates of heaven.
~~~~
Hanging the Moon and stars for you
The moon shall give light to see
Words of my love written with those stars
Take my hand and dance with me
Among the constellations of the Milky Way
Hold me close as we Waltz through the
Little Dipper, Lynx and Leo Minor
Fox Trot through Orion, Phoenix, and Ara

While the moon shows the way  we will rest
At the Star Sculptor as he dances with Antilia
The Phoenix will rise to dance with Cassropeia
Celebrating our love made in the stars with the
waxen Moon showing the way, to Aries, Geminii
Libra and the rest , showing you my heart hanging
amongst the stars for you to accept.

~~~~~
Moody Blues
Mean Green
Sunny Yellow
Black as Night
White as Snow
Purple Haze

Color descriptions
Describing the world
Describing the people

Gray Clouds
Blue Skies
Cherry Reds

Black People
White People
Yellow People
Brown People

My blood is red when I bleed
My tears are clear and taste salty
Everyone’s blood is red when they bleed
Everyone’s tears are clear and taste salty

So why do we hate that which is different
Why do we hate those that are different
Why do we fear what we don’t understand
reach out a hand say hello, give a smile
Do Not fear those of difference
Embrace, Open Mind, Accept
The differences of Each Other
Beloved, I stand among the Aspens dreaming of our time together
When the trees were a brilliant green with tall sturdy trunks of white
Hearing the whisper of rustling leaves speaking to one another
Echoing along the mountaintops and into the clouds
Are they telling our secret,s Our secret times of loving?

I count the days, I loathe the long dark nights
Hungry for you, thirst for you, long for you
Needing your warm sensual touch
Satisfaction a memory of you, only you.

~~~~
if I could hold you, if you could hold me
would the loneliness disappear
my arms ache , my body hungers
for the touch only you can give
all alone  and lonely, longing, loving
you and only you
arms empty, yearning heart ~ soul
sadness washes over me
hunger for your touch
lonely, alone…… yet again

FIELD HAND
All had left the field gone back to the bunk house
he had opted to stay and take a dip in the lake
over in the next section. Now  cooled off he
could drive the tractor back, grab some chow and a
bedroll, just to start again on the morrow.
Passing under an apple tree he reached up to grab one
realizing he didn’t have his knife to peel it he turned the
tractor back toward the lake.
He noticed the silence first and then the darkness that
suddenly covered all, then just as sudden as the dark came
the moon, a full moon at that appeared.

looking at the man in the moon
a mist began to form
clouds he supposed… too soon
an apparition not the norm
began to swirl about his head
aroma of jasmine and monkshood
lavender with lilac and ginger
the feeling of dizziness and spinning
ever faster, she was the most beautiful
woman he had ever seen or felt, her
hands , legs, and body wrapped him
in a cocoon then exploded him like a beautiful
chrysalis
man in the moon looking at me
as mist began to fade, the sun 
was rising in the east , the night had gone
jasmine and ginger still
lingered tho’ he had no more memory than
that written
his body felt sated , relaxed. What took place
he shook his head to clear it to no avail. 

The crew came by truck, jumping off three to a row
picking the tomatoes
as he drove by each, they waved or saluted some
even a sly smile as if they knew more than he of
the night before. A few even commented on his new
scent.  None could feel what he felt he knew.

BEAUTY SCARS
SO MUCH HAD HAPPENED THIS LAST FEW MONTHS
THE STRESS, WORK AND THOSE SHE SUPERVISED
FAMILY TRIALS AND TRIBULATIONS SHE BEING OLDEST
OF COURSE THEY CAME TO HER FOR ADVICE BUT USUALLY
MONEY.  SHE FELT USED AND RE`USED

SHE HAD THREE WEEKS OFF TIME, SHE WAS GOING ALONE

WHEREVER THE FIRST PLANE OUT OF HERE WILL TAKE HER,
SHE LOVES HER FAMILY BUT IF SHE DOESN’T GET AWAY FROM
THEM AND THEIR DRAMA …A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN FOR SURE.
SHE CAUGHT A FLIGHT TO  COLORADO , 


BEAUTIFUL COUNTRY, MOUNTAINS, PINES, RIVERS, ASPENS,
A CRISPNESS  IN THE AIR AS SHE STEPS OUT OF THE CABIN.
NO CELL PHONES WORK HERE, THERE WAS A LAND LINE
AT THE B&B SHOULD SHE NEED TO CHECK ON ANYONE, BUT
SHE WAS ENJOYING THAT NO ONE KNEW WHERE SHE WAS AND
COULD NOT REACH OUT AND TOUCH HER HERE. 


SHE WAS GOING HIKING THIS MORNING UP AS FAR AS SHE CAN
AND FEEL SAFE . SHE HAD FOUND A WALKING STICK YESTERDAY
ON HER WAY TO THIS CABIN.
AFTER BREAKFAST AT THE B&B SHE TOOK UP HER
WALKING STICK AND HER HIKE BEGAN
THE LEAVES OF THE ASPENS RUBBING TOGETHER
MADE A MOST SOOTHING SOUND SHE STOPPED TO LISTEN
JUST QUIET , SILENT, CALM

SHE MOVED ON FOR FEAR SHE WOULD MISS THE BEAUTY
OF THIS LAND IF SHE DIDN’T TAKE IT ALL IN NOW
THE HIGHER SHE WENT THE MORE BEAUTY REVEALED
THE TREES CHANGED TO MAJESTIC PINES MANY WITH
THEIR BARK PARTIALLY REMOVED, SHE KNEW THIS TO BE
WHERE THE NATIVE INDIANS STRIPPED THE OUTER BARK
FOR GUM USING THE UNDER~LAYER TO CHEW.


IN SPOTS THE MARKS WERE QUITE DISFIGURING AND UGLY
SOME FILLED WITH SAP THAT HAD CRYSTALLIZED LIKE SUGAR
THE WIND AND WEATHER BRINGING FORTH
SCARS OF BEAUTY.
LATER IN HER CABIN SHE PRAYED THANKING
HER CREATOR FOR THE BEAUTY REVEALED TO HER TODAY
FOR HAVING LOST HER FAITH THROUGH THE CHALLENGES
BITTERNESS GRIEF AND STRIFE WITHIN HER FAMILY AND
HERSELF SHE KNEW GOD REVEALED HIMSELF TODAY
SHOWING HER THAT THE SCARS ON HER HEART AND BODY
WERE AS BEAUTIFUL AS THE CRYSTAL SAP SCARS
OF THE PINES.
NOW IN ASKING GOD FOR FORGIVENESS SHE KNEW
SHE COULD  FORGIVE HERSELF

VETERANS

Smell of coffee wafting through the kitchen

An empty chair at the breakfast table

Your muddy boots placed by the back door

Letterman jacket on peg next to your dusty hat

Ol’ Joe lying at my feet, watching door…waiting

 

Smell of your cologne still lingers in your room, toothpaste in sink

Wet towel~ dry now on your bed, missing socks under the dresser

Car keys, gas money, pizza coupons, movie ticket stubs

Trophies on a shelf, ribbons on wall all these things I see..
everyday through my tears 

 

Walking to your last resting place

Placing a single rose next to your name

Nineteen, life gone to soon

 

My freedom? 

When the chains of grief

Unshackle me to be with my son

He gave his life for his country

He gave his life for YOUR FREEDOM

if I were a poet , I would write flowery words of love to you
were I a sculpter, I would form your likeness of clay
I would gaze upon your beauty and create my view
with brush and paint on canvas, I would bleed my heart til blue
music maker I would be, with songs in my soul proclaiming you,
dancer I would be, stepping through the heavens for love
I am but a simple being, needing to share my life with you.

copyright 2013 LMWC, myownheart.me


INSANITY
THE ILLNESS CREEPS INTO YOUR MIND
HISSING ITS BLACKENED TARRY VOICES
MAKING YOU BELIEVE UNTRUTHS
WHISPERING DIRECTIONS ON YOUR PATH
TO WIND YOU  ROUND IN CIRCLES
SPINNING  SPIRALING TWISTING
FOREVER DOWNWARD MORE ‘N MORE
LOSING YOUR SANITY WITH EACH CIRCLE
WILL YOU EVER COME BACK
WILL YOU EVER COME HOME
TO THOSE THAT LOVE AND CARE ABOUT YOU

LOVE COLORS
BLUSHING PINK IS THE COLOR OF PUPPY LOVE AND THE  RED CREEPING UP THE EARS AND CHEEKS WITH TUCKED HEADS AND DOWN CAST EYES.
SUNFLOWER YELLOW FOR THE SUNSHINE GLOW WHEN YOU SEE EACH OTHER
JALEPENO GREEN FOR THE JEALOUSY THAT COMES WITH THE IMMATURE
PURPLE HAZE AS LOVE GROWS AND FAMILIARITY SETS IN
R & B BLUES WHEN LOVE GOES SO WRONG AND BREAK ~UP OCCURS
MATURITY COMES WITH COLLEGE COLORS, BEING PINNED….TAKE YOUR CHOICE OF COLOR
ROMAN CANDLES WITH EVERY COLOR IN THE RAINBOW FOR THE PASSIONS FLARE
WHITE FOR THE PURITY, SANCTITY OF MARRIAGE, STARS  AND CLOUDS IN THE SKY AND MIND
ANGER RED FOR FIGHTS OVER MONEY SPENT, TIME NOT TOGETHER
BLUE OR PINK FOR NURSERY WHAT SAY YOU COLOR OF JOY?
GREEN FOR DOCTORS BILLS, SCHOOL, CLOTHING, FOOD, COLLEGE FUND AND ON AND ON AND ON AND…..NEVER ENOUGH
SILVER FOR CELEBRATING A FEW YEARS TOGETHER
GOLD FOR A MAJOR CELEBRATION OF FIFTY
SEVENTY~FIVE DIAMONDS ARE A GIRLS BEST FRIEND!
BLACK VEIL, DRESS, HEARST
GOLDEN WALNUT/OAK CARRIED AND PLACED SIX FEET UNDER.
BLUE GRAY FOR GRIEF
RED FOR ANGER
BLUE FOR LONELY

WILLOW WEEPS
OVERHEAD THERE IS A FULL MOON
STARS SHOOT ACROSS THE SKY
CICADAS SING THEIR SONG  

SCENT OF PINE FILLS THE AIR
ASPEN OAK AND MAPLE LEAVES
SING IN THE WIND
MOONS FULL REFLECTION ON THE WATER
BASS AND TROUT FLASH SILVER
WATER DROPLETS WITH EACH JUMP

WEEPING WILLOW WEEPS
FOR ME
I AM MISSING YOU

 

~~~~~
I tried I really did I knew that blue rhymed with true
that mean would go with green or tree or even me!
everything I thought of sounded like a third grader
so I read other poetry, intelligent well spoken chatter
from people schooled and unschooled, felt the fool
I evidently don’t have a brain or the ‘write’ tool
giving up tell the professor ‘dog ate my homework’
mom washed it, left it in my other bag, no poet will
I be … just a disheartened mail~room clerk.

~~~~~
WHAT DOES “LOVE” MEAN?
IS IT THAT GIDDY BUTTERFLY FEELING  WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOUR ATTRACTED TOO, OR IS IT THE COMFORT OF THAT OL’ CHENILLE ROBE AND THE WORN OUT SLIPPER WITH HALF A SOLE.

IS IT THE FEELING OF …IF THEY AREN’T WITH ME OR ON THE PHONE, ONLINE WITH ME, OR  EXACTLY
WHERE THEY SAY THEY WILL BE, WE GET THAT ‘THEY DON’T LOVE ME FEELING’
OR KNOWING THAT THEY ARE WHERE THEY NEED TO BE AND YOU ARE WHERE YOU ARE AND WHEN YOU COME TOGETHER  IT IS MAGIC.

WHAT DOES LOVE MEAN?

IS IT GIVING THEIR HEART AND SOUL TO YOU AND YOU GIVE BROKEN DREAMS
OR THE OTHER WAY… IS IT TAKING MORE THAN YOU GIVE OR GIVING MORE THAN YOU RECEIVE

IS IT THE ANGST OF PUPPY LOVE, FIRST LOVES, MELDING OF FLESH TO SATISFY

WHAT DOES LOVE MEAN?
A CIRCLE OF GOLD UNBROKEN FILLED WITH TRUST, RESPECT, ADMIRATION AND FUN
A BUILDING OF HEARTS AS ONE OVER TIME TO THE OLD AGE OF TOGETHERNESS,
FAMILY, BLOOD LINES, CHILDREN, GRANDCHILDREN, LIFE, DEATH AND MEMORIES
A SWELLING OF THE HEART WHEN YOU GAZE AT THE PICTURE
ON THE BEDSIDE TABLE.
NO FEAR OF WALKING THE LAST PATH ALONE FOR YOU KNOW WHEN YOU GET TO WHERE YOU BELONG YOUR LOVE WILL BE THERE WITH  OPEN ARMS.


CHOCOLATE
Discovered a sweet sensation
a dark  sugary treat
cocoa flavored
made into many concoctions
covered in chocolate morsels of
caramel, peanut butter
addictive drug inducing
cherries ummm strawberries
Then oh my, white sweet chocolate
covering salty pretzels
marshmallows
peanuts, raisins
nougat, hot drinks
cold chocolate milk
puddings, parfaits,
cookies, cakes  and fudge
Hello, my name is Obese
My name was once Lean

 
PUSHING your rosy pink theory

your utopia way of life never having

lived a moment on a street

never hungry, cold, broke alone or with your children

never beaten emotionally or physically time and again

always had mommy and daddy and all the siblings

to love and nurture your head in the sand thinking.

Get real ! Life is not as your generation sees it

there is STILL after MLK and the Kennedy’s, prejuidice

there is a race line not just with blacks,

but Indians, Muslims, Pakistani’s , Chinese, Vietnamese

It is there it is real.

Equality for everyone was our dream in the sixties and

we did all we could and then some but to this day

women are still paid less than men for the same job.

African~American men have more opportunity but not as many

as the white men

You asked how could I count all Muslims as bad.. I don’t

I just believe when push comes to shove like will support like.

You ask that I show love to EVERY Muslim that was cheering on 9~11

I stated I can not, you then asked how can I lump them all together.

I ask you, did you watch the horror of planes crashing into the Twin Towers?

did you know the hijackers went to school here in this OUR  country to learn to fly

those planes, do you know they professed to our faces how great America was and

they loved it! Then they went into the twin towers and down in PA and the Pentagon area.

How can I trust or not generalize when over 3000 of my brothers and sisters were killed that day.

How can I  trust when Vietnam was so bloody and cruel  and ruined so many lives?

When people I loved died on the grounds of that country  or came home to kill themselves for what they had done, lived and seen.

How can you tell me I am wrong when babies and little children are killed in drive~bys innocently sleeping

in their beds and then their family is told oh wrong house, wrong street. Where are your rosy glasses now?

Ostriches get your heads out of the sand for I fear when you are released into the real world

you will be so unprepared and naive that you will either lose your mind or die.

there is no utopia, no every person equal, no erased racial line, nor religion or politics perfect.

I fear for the future of our country if your generation are the future leaders!
~~~~~
Need to get out of this small town,

can feel my life going down

big city where I belong

don’t need a tag a-long

just me and the city lights

City lights not what I expected

this life is all twisted

Never thought I’d want to go back

but here I am following a train track

Never thought I’d be slowing down

as I am now,

as I drag into my town.


THE DRUNK

She lay in the bed listening to him mumble and slur the conversation he was having with himself in the other room. He had been drinking all afternoon while she was at work and he was supposed to be taking care of his sons. She doesn’t know how much more she can take, this is getting so old, he drinks, they fight, the boys get upset and  the circle just continues. She can’t call her mom, as much as she would like to: that would just make her worry more than she does already.Oh God he’s coming in here please let him just pass out please God. He throws back the door and it slams against the wall. He looks at her with his drunk eyes and smiles , his smile more like a sneer. Falling across the bed he reaches for her breast  with one hand  trying to unzip his pants with the other. She knows from past experience not to protest or she’ll end up hurt . Lying as still as possible trying to breath quietly so as not to upset him, praying “God please protect me” he moves a little closer and then  oh thank you Jesus he is snoring …just like that!She knows it won’t be much longer and she will be able to get away, this is her last year of nursing school then she will be able to get a position anywhere away from him.  She lifts his hand off of her breast and slowly quietly moves away from him. She takes her pillow and a blanket to the sofa ….now now she can rest.


RAIN COLORS
Falling upon the cobblestone street

washing away the dirt and grime

making rainbows of many hues

purples, green, yellows and blues

moons reflection lost in psychedelic shimmers.
SURVIVAL
The sleek jaguar licked his dry lips wet

anticipating the tasty morsel there in the mud

twas really a mimicry of his prowess as a

predator….the tortoise such a vulnerable

appetizing beginning of his meal.

with surgical precision he unfolded his lean

pencil thin body and …hearing a sound he

bristled

Ahh the pest coming from the morphing

tunnel, where crocheted cocoons of beauty dwelt

she will be fluttering around telling him to

leave the tortoise alone even as the tortoise

raises his knobbed head to funnel her right

into his mouth popping her like a honeydew melon.

“Jag stop, do not, do not I tell you do that !”

She became quite incoherent, incensed even when

she found him about to eat anything in the forest.

“But I am hungry” he whispered so as not to frighten

his meal deeper into the mud, making him blend into the

brownish green muck making him harder to find. He was

endemic to this particular area and moving slow or not could be

difficult to find, and he was hungry!

“Oh, take your out of shape probiscus and stick it,

go excrete pheromones or something !  Isn’t it

time for you to put your photonic eyespot on some poor

imago?”   She fluttered around him  with her blue eyes flashing

pink and green wings brushing against his fur, she began her

transcription with her lilting voice. Hauntingly beautiful she

composed as she sang knowing her voice would lull Jag  to

sleep so that the tortoise could burrow away until another day.
FOG
The mist engulfed her car, as she felt fear for the first time; traveling alone.

Slowing the car and placing her lights on dim the trees began to take on

strange and ominous shapes, arms reaching out to grab her. The music

became louder the further she drove through the trees lining the road she

drove upon, moss becoming her shroud. Louder and louder the music, the louder

her heart beat became. Frantically she slammed her hand across the clock radio that

made her heart race with fear.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN
The grim reaper walks,

He staggers a crooked line

The vampire skulks and creeps

Fine blood he desires is mine

The full golden-hued  moon

Brings forth other-worldly howls

Human to werewolf by the bowels

Upon her broom the Hag does fly
Spells and curses of doom

Spread in every town and ruin
as she sweeps by

The mummy wrapped so tight
weeps and moans through the night

Black cats hissing and spitting
Scratching at the sight of visitors
In the graveyard walking at night.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN !!!

A Piece of Your Mind Please

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