I have been so excited knowing the battle was coming to an end and all the test and biopsy results were looking good but then…
i went in three days ago for the second mammogram this year as doctor requested and today received instructions to make myself available as the “examination performed, requires additional imaging studies. The further testing should not be ignored, please call ***-***-**** to schedule this testing as soon as possible.”
How wonderful that I receive this missive late Friday after all offices are closed and therefore must now wait until Monday.
Not sure how I feel about this latest development, I am angry with why me? pitiful with why me? resigned to ok lets do this. I don’t know how any one else does this and especially those that have no one. I am blessed to have my youngest daughter for support but hate like everything to add to her burden, a husband that says “we can beat it” but an hour later has no clue to the entire conversation. I have wonderful online friends that will give me love, hugs and encouragement and I am so blessed to have them. I have brothers and sisters that have their own lives and health issues so it’s hard to ask them or expect them to be here. Guess what I am saying is I need to stand strong on my own, because what it comes down to is me fighting for my own life so that I am around for a good long time and no one else can do that for me.
I am standing on my faith and my own personal strength and who knows maybe this next round of tests will be a false alarm but in my gut I know there is something more there. There is a sense of something being wrong which is the same feeling I had when this bit of my journey started.
I have rambled enough my fellow blogging and online friends so I shall wish you a beautiful blessed night/day/evening wherever you are in whatever time zone. Peace and love to all.